Monday, April 22, 2019
accepting who i'm not (inspired by but first, coffee)
I am not a blogger with a perfectly curated Instagram feed. I am not someone who takes incredible photos or attends fancy beauty events. I am not the kind of makeup addict who creates looks so inspiring - everyone is desperate to re-create them. I am not a full-time blogger. I am not a beauty expert. (Even if I want to be.) There are so many things that I am not. Things that for a long time, made me feel small. Things that made me feel lacking or less than. It wasn't until I read a recent post from But First, Coffee called, "Accepting Who I'm NOT," that I started to feel okay about these things.
In the post, she talked about the comparison trap. This is something many of us are familiar with. One moment, you are having a great day at home with a good book. You are comfortable, content, and feeling positive about life. Then you casually open Instagram. Bam! You see a picture of some school chums laughing and smiling at a local event. Immediately your attitude shifts. Why wasn't I invited? They look so good. I wish I could pull off an outfit like that. How does she get her makeup to look so perfect? No one ever wants to do anything with me. The comparison trap is real and it is dangerous. It causes us to feel dissatisfied...even if we were feeling fabulous only moments ago.
So, what can be done about it? How can we move past the need to compare? Since we know that comparison is the thief of joy (so said Theodore Roosevelt) it is time to stop comparing our bodies, our talents, our lives, our successes, and our failures to the people we know. To the people we see online. To the people we make assumptions about. The reality is that we will never know someone else's full story. We don't know what they are struggling with or what they think about before they shut their eyes at night. Even if we did....their moments of bliss do not take away from what we have going on in our own lives.
Today I am taking back my power. By accepting what I am not....I reclaim who I am. I am consciously taking this opportunity to shine a light on all the wonderful things I have to offer. The following is a short list of things that I am:
I am Creative. When it comes to hobbies, there are many that fill my thoughts, my life, and my days. Even when I was a little kid, I was always doing something creative. (Not necessarily well but I did it nonetheless!) These days, I write articles for several different websites, I create content for my blog, I film videos for my YouTube channel, I am working on a book series, I enjoy painting and latch hook, and well, I simply enjoy doing things and being creative. In whatever way that manifests.
I am Supportive. Certain people from my past made me doubt this next statement for a hot second. Not anymore! Something else I am is supportive. I do my best to put myself in other people's shoes. To listen. To allow them to be heard and understood. To make them feel valued. I am the head cheerleader to many people in my life today - and that feels good. I like knowing that I can be a support to those who reach out to me.
I am Eager to Learn. It is exciting to discover new talents and new interests. Or to dive deeper into existing areas of interest. I absolutely love to learn about topics that excite me. Whether that has to do with makeup application, the fashion industry, essential oils, poetry analysis...learning new things can be thrilling. There are so many topics I am eager to learn more about. It expands my knowledge, of course, but it also expands who I am as a human being.
I am Passionate. In case you didn't know it, I am a Scorpio, and wow are we a passionate sign. When talking about some of the things I am, the word passionate simply must be included. I feel things deeply. I get excited about topics that matter to me. I care about others. I am passionate about so many aspects of life, and I love that about myself. I would rather be passionate and misspeak every once and a while than be detached. Sometimes, even the traits other people see as "bad" or "undesirable" can be downright wonderful. In the words of Lisa Rinna....own it!
These are some of the things that I am. Please leave a comment down below (or create your own post) and share some of the things you are. By owning all aspects of ourselves....we can put an end to the comparison trap once and for all.